Sing Hallelulah

Our second daughter, Sophie Elizabeth Jenkins, was born last Thursday afternoon. Words can't describe the joy I experienced the moment I first saw her. I may be biased, but she is so beautiful!

As I held my new daughter for the first time, and my eyes surveyed her newborn skin and dark hair, I began to think about God's wonderful plans for her. Sophie's life is a story that is just beginning. God is holding the pen, and I'm confident He will tell one grand story through her. That's one of my favorite aspects of God--He's an amazing author. He always has been and always will be.

My prayer for Sophie is that she'll be aware of the story that is unfolding around her on a daily basis. It truly is a love story--a passionate love story between the Creator of the Universe and this 6 lb 14 ounce beauty. How fun it will be to watch this play out. I think she's off to a good start...

Here's a video of Sophie's story so far.

Not As It Appears

I made a call this week to have the yard aerated. To be honest, I had no idea what benefit aerating the grass had, but I still made the call and wrote the check. I have since done some research and have learned that it's incredibly healthy for the soil. In a nutshell, it's the removal of soil plugs in order to increase the water, nutrient, and oxygen movement into the soil. Something had to be removed, so that something much needed could enter...More on that later.

A recently aerated lawn is an interesting sight. It looks like a person has neglected to clean up after their dog since the late 1990's. When I was a young boy, one of my weekly chores included going on "poop patrol."  I believe I became quite proficient at searching the yard--while watching my steps very closely--scooping, and disposing of the "treasure" in record time. I was good...Maybe that's why I never got fired from the job.

Very early on in my scooping career, I remember picking up a shovel and walking to the back yard only to see a sight that no eight year old pooper scooper wants to see. My parents had just had the lawn aerated, but to me it looked like every dog in a five mile radius had just left me a present. I stood there in disbelief. I glanced at the neighbor's yard to see if they were also the recipients of the dog party, but their yard was "poopless." How could this be? Was this some sort of bad joke? I was discouraged.

Now that I'm thirty, I look back and smile on that day. My lack of understanding of lawn aeration led me to believe that my eight year old life just got a lot worse. In reality, what I thought was a horrible sight was actually quite healthy for the yard--and good for me. I believe I dismissed myself of my duties that day claiming that I couldn't tell the difference between the dog's mess and the aeration. My initial reaction was clearly misguided.

That wasn't the last time my initial response to something has been off. I've noticed how easy it is to make an initial judgment on something thinking it's bad, and then placing the blame on God for causing it. When this happens it's just a matter of time before your heart grows hard towards the God who is crazy about you.

Several years ago, I had a relationship crumble around me. I was deeply invested into this relationship and thought it would most likely end in marriage. In the depths of my heart, I knew the relationship wasn't what God wanted, but I chose to ignore the truth and continue plowing forward. I'll never forget the pain in my heart as the two of us came to grips with the reality of breaking up for good. I was heartbroken. I was devastated. I literally took my phone and threw it across the room as I blamed God for breaking my heart. I lacked understanding. My initial response was way off, again. In this case, the relationship needed to be removed so that God could enter and have His way.

I took Avery on a daddy-daughter date a few weeks ago, and we enjoyed some seriously delicious meatball sandwiches (this time it was my pick!). I sat across the table from her and was taken aback by how her blue eyes were shining so brightly in the light. As we talked, laughed, and made a mess, I noticed a song that happened to be playing on the radio in the background. It was a song that reminded me of my former relationship. It was quite evident to me that the pain was long gone, and instead of anger at God, I couldn't stop praising Him. God knew what He was doing after all. All I had to do is look across the table and into the eyes of my daughter to be reminded of His faithfulness. I drove home and embraced my wife with a hug and kiss, and thanked God for being so patient with me.

Living with a hard heart is a miserable way to live life. It will rob you of experiencing the joy God created you to experience. Life can be rough. Life can seem wildly unfair. But I pray that you'll fight with every ounce of strength within you to maintain a soft heart. The Scriptures clearly state the importance of this in Proverbs 4:23: "Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it."

The next time you are tempted to blame God for causing something bad in your life, I encourage you to pause and ask Him to give you true understanding into the situation. Remind yourself of God's nature. He is the life giver, not the thief. Fight the urge to run from God, and cling to Him. You'll be in good hands.

Romans 8:28 "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."

Glorious and More Glorious

There are few dull moments when you are married to a woman who is 9 months pregnant. I've been on high alert for the past several days. Just last week I was sitting in my comfortable brown recliner when I heard moaning and groaning coming from upstairs. I jumped to my feet and ran over to the stairs--fully expecting to load Ashley up, and like a 10 year old sitting behind a steering wheel in an arcade, drive 80 mph weaving my way in and out of traffic on our way to the hospital (the man clearly gets the better deal in this whole process). I got to the stairs and with deep concern and anticipation in my voice asked her what was happening. Her response was, "Ooh nothing honey. I just feel so large!" False alarm. The racecar driving would have to wait for another day.

I was recently driving (the speed limit) down the interstate when my eyes drifted over to enjoy the majestic and beautiful Colorado Rockies. I have surveyed these same mountains thousands of times over the past six years, but this time was different. I was drawn to the extraordinary detail that God used as He shaped this particular mountain range. As my eyes shifted back and forth between the road and the mountains, I began thinking about how God had placed every tree just where He wanted it. He shaped every nook and cranny on every mountain. Even today, He orders the water where to run as the snow melt turns into summer streams. Praise filled my heart as I thought about the good work God accomplished in creating the Rocky Mountains.

He responded by speaking the following statement to my heart: "I put more work into creating you than I did that mountain range." My initial response was to think that I must have eaten a bad pizza for lunch and am now hearing things. Surely God didn't put more detail into creating me than this spectacular mountain range my eyes were beholding. I'm confident I heard Him right, but it took my heart a minute to digest the truth of that statement.

13 For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
15 My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place,
when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.
16 Your eyes saw my unformed body;
all the days ordained for me were written in your book
before one of them came to be. Psalm 139:13-16

The development process that occurs inside the womb is fascinating. It reveals just how detailed and mysterious God is. He created the earth and everything in it in seven days, and yet He chooses to take nine months to form a baby inside the womb! We really are His masterpiece (Ephesians 2:10).

Pikes Peak is a glorious mountain. It's never uttered a word, but it speaks continually of the presence and glory of the Creator. This glorious God has placed more glory upon you than on any mountain, canyon, ocean, sunset, or anything else your eyes will see. He has made you in His image. It's true that you bear His name and His image. Let that sink into your heart. You are His primary plan to reveal His glory to a dark world. When we grasp the truth of this, life goes from being mundane, boring and ordinary to extraordinary, supernatural and purposeful.

Our second daughter will arrive any day now. As excited as we are, we're also aware that she really doesn't belong to us but rather to God. He knew her before the creation of the world, and He has spent the past nine months meticulously forming her. May I be a good steward of something that is so precious to Him.

God help me.

Messy Fingers and Clean Pages

Avery and I recently embarked on another daddy-daughter date, and it was wonderful as usual. As we pulled into the parking lot at Chic-Fil-A, the smile on her face communicated that I had chosen correctly. She knew she was about to enjoy some quality chicken nuggets, play time on their slide, and some time with dad.

What she didn't realize was that there would be an added bonus to this particular date. As we sat there enjoying our meals and each other's company, I could tell Avery had spotted something interesting over my shoulder. In fact, her eyes about popped out of her head as soon as she saw "it". I turned to see what she was looking at, and sure enough, the Chic-Fil-A cow was officially in the building. She started bouncing in her seat and pointing at the large bovine. I was also happy to see the cow, even though I knew it would steal her attention for the rest of our meal. Stinking cow....

Avery spent the next several minutes waving at the cow from a distance, and making "moooo" noises. She laughed the whole time. I was still trying hopelessly to engage her in conversation, but it wasn't happening. I soon joined her in making "moooo" noises.

The cow slowly began to make its way in our direction, and I watched as Avery's look changed from fascination to uncertainty. The waving and "moooing" stopped, and it wasn't long before she was quite scared.




I stopped recording and quickly picked Avery up to comfort her (she gave me a big ketchup fingers hug--love it!), and I assured her that, "Daddy wouldn't let the cow hurt her." She eventually calmed down, and started waving at the cow again--from a safe distance.

The friendly Chic-Fil-A cow is quite harmless--especially when dad is present. I'm not going to let anything near Avery that will harm her. She is safe because she is with me. She is safe because of my great love for her. In the heat of the moment, she forgot that simple truth and allowed fear to grip her heart.

This happens to all of us from time to time. We forget who our Heavenly Father is, and we allow fear to grip our heart. The truth is that we have nothing to fear. You are safe because of the Father's great love for you. You are safe because of the Father's presence. You are safe because you are his son/daughter, and He has taken responsibility for your life.

14 For those who are led by the Spirit of God are the children of God. 15 The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship. And by him we cry, “Abba, Father.” 16 The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children. Romans 8:14-16.

The Scriptures reveal to us that as we grow in our understanding of "sonship", fear will lose its place in our hearts. When we understand the true nature of God as our Father, nothing can scare or shake us. If God is for us, who can be against us? When we misunderstand the true nature of God, we give fear a place to abide. Simply put, fear is a result of a misunderstanding of the Father's nature.

I recently noticed that I had been allowing a fear of rejection to linger in my heart. It had affected my behavior and resulted in timidity in certain areas of my life. Armed with the understanding that fear is a result of believing a lie, I went to God and asked him to reveal the lie that had made a subtle home in my heart.

God is faithful. Not only did He reveal the lie, but he also revealed the truth. I didn't have to twist his arm to show me the truth; He had been waiting patiently for me to ask. I renounced the lie, and took hold of the truth. Before long, I experienced the welcomed arrival of freedom (John 8:32).

God's answer to my question surprised me. He gently revealed that I didn't fully trust Him. When I asked how I develop a deeper trust, He replied, "Start with a clean page and find out who I truly am." That was a bit of a shock. I could have responded in a prideful way. After all, I've been walking with Christ for many years. I am a pastor, and my job is to represent God--surely I know Him. I'm glad I accepted His offer, because it's been amazing to watch him re-reveal Himself. In some cases he simply reminded me of things I had forgotten, and in other cases He revealed amazing new revelation of His heart. As I grew in my understanding of His perfect love, fear was cast out (1 John 4:18).

I believe God wants to spend some quality time with you. Get away with Him and ask if you've allowed fear to entangle itself within your heart. Maybe you already know the answer, and you can simply skip to the next question--what lie have I believed, and what is the truth? Stay with the question until you get an answer. It will surely come. Then, take hold of the truth and meditate upon it. Write it down and place it where you can see it daily. Allow it to take root in your heart. As a good steak marinates in special sauce, let your heart marinate in the truth. You will like the result.

Looking back, the fear that I allowed to affect my heart was just as silly as Avery's fear of the "high-fiving" cow. When we see truth clearly, all fear is exposed and put in its proper place. Remember, you are not slaves of fear, but you are a son and daughter of the Most High God. God is calling you to live a fear-free, abundant life. Take Him up on the offer.

Start with a clean page.

Only 20,466 More Days

Bill and June Sharp have been married for 22,046 days. For those of you who vowed to give up math after your last Algebra class in high school, that's over 60 years of bliss. I had the amazing privilege of leading my sweet grandparents in the renewing of their vows last summer as they celebrated their amazing accomplishment. It was a great day!

Ashley and I are quickly approaching our fourth anniversary. I have so much to learn about this marriage thing, but I do know that it's a good thing...a really good thing.

In fact, I believe marriage is one of God's greatest gifts to us. My life has become indescribably richer since the day Ashley walked down the aisle and met me at the altar. We were floating on cloud nine, and our faces could barely contain our smiles as we stood before God, family, and friends and declared our lifetime vows to one another. If that wasn't amazing enough, the next day we were on a flight to the Caribbean for our honeymoon.

I had to pinch myself to make sure this wasn't a dream. Was I really going to one of the most beautiful places on the planet with the most beautiful woman on the planet? Was I really going to get to stare at this "hot blonde" in a bikini all week? Was this really legal now? Of course it was legal, we were married. God pronounced it all good. I could feel the sting of the pinch. This was a reality.

Speaking of reality, anybody who has been married for more than two weeks knows that reality sets in. Marriage is not a continual honeymoon that two people enjoy until death does them part. Far, far from it. The honeymoon beach bodies don't last forever; neither does the feeling of pure giddiness. Developing and enjoying a healthy marriage is one of the biggest challenges that a man and woman will face. It's certainly not for the faint of heart.

The honeymoon was certainly surreal. So was the first time I found myself sleeping on the couch--for all of about 2 hours--until we made things right. As those first days began to become a memory, I realized that marriage was indeed a blessing--sometimes a blessing in disguise. Disagreement happens. Fights happen. Hearts can grow hard. The walls can be quick to appear. Couples can find themselves in a rut that is hard to pull out of. However, as long as Christ is alive, there is hope.

Ashley and I went on a date tonight, and it was one of the most enjoyable dates I've ever had. It was extremely simple, but extremely rich. As we drove to Chipotle, I said a quick prayer and invited God into the evening. I simply acknowledged His presence and asked him to make it a rich evening. He's good at answering simple prayers.

We sat on barstool type chairs, looking out on a busy sidewalk in downtown Colorado Springs. When I was able to pry my eyes away from this "hot blonde" sitting next to me, I enjoyed the perfect view of the sun setting over Pikes Peak. We flirted, laughed, talked, people watched, and enjoyed being together. It was--well, a RICH date!

A few hours before the date, Ashley and I both agreed to ask God what He wanted to say to the other person. After all, God is a Father. What father doesn't like to speak to his children? As Ashley was doing her hair in the bathroom, she asked God what He wanted to say to me. Meanwhile, I sat at the kitchen table with a pen in hand and asked God what He wanted to say to His daughter. Later at Chipotle, we shared with each other what we believed God was saying. It was anything but ordinary. It was deeply refreshing. It was a result of simply inviting God into an ordinary date.

Don't get me wrong, we're not about to write a marriage book. I have more to learn than I have to offer. My grandparents should write a marriage book. My parents, who will be celebrating their 35th anniversary this year, should write a book. That's not where we're at right now. But, we have stumbled upon a few things that have really helped us thus far.

First of all, we try and remember who is on our side. It's easy to forget that the creator of the Universe is in your corner. God is the biggest fan of your marriage. He created romance--you should have seen the sun setting over the peak--and He wants you to experience abundant life in your marriage more than anyone, including you. When you turn to God, you are opening the door for Him to pour life into your marriage. It doesn't matter how far off track you may think you are. He is still as committed as ever to lead you and your spouse into the marriage He dreamt of when He brought you together. He has the road map. He has the ideas. Your responsibility is to open the door to Him, and then trust what He is telling you to do. It may seem impossible, but as one of my favorite verses states: "Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we can think of or imagine according to His power that is at work within us..." (Ephesians 3:20). It requires faith, but then again, isn't it impossible to please God without faith? The more you are committed to pleasing Him, the more you will see the transformation happen in your marriage.

Secondly, we try and enjoy one another. It's easy to fall into a mundane and boring routine where we end up simply cohabitating together as we share a roof, a bed, and a toilet. It's easy to only relate to each other as the mom or dad of your children. We're learning the power and importance of intentionality. Marriage can be as boring or as enjoyable as Ashley and I choose to make it. God has given us a blank canvas and wants to help us create a masterpiece. His heart beats for us to create a marriage that reflects the love that Christ has for the church.

Lastly, we try and keep the "big picture" in front of us. Sure we're going to have many disagreements in the years to come. Sure we'll face temptations and accusations from the enemy. However, if we can be mindful of our "big picture" life goals--faithfulness to God and each other--it will be easier to forgive and easier to remain loyal in our marriage.

I think there's some truth to the old saying, "If you aim at nothing, you are sure to hit your target." My target is clear. In 56 years, I want to be holding hands with my "hot gray" wife while my grandson leads us in the renewing of our vows.

That will be a great day.

That will be a rich life.

Fixing Glass....and relationships.

Sometimes I have a tendency of procrastinating on certain projects that are going to cost hundreds of dollars. My old truck was nicknamed "Junior" (not exactly one of those trucks you see in television commercials pulling 737's behind it) and among other aesthetic flaws, it had a huge crack that ran the length of the windshield. It wasn't until the day of my first date with Ashley that I finally shelled out the money to get it replaced. Convincing her to date a man who drove a pick up named "Junior" was going to be a big enough challenge; the least I could do is pull up in a ride that had a window you could see out of.

Someday I believe I will drive a big ol' truck that I can be proud of. In the meantime, I am driving a four door Honda that is faithful in getting me from point A to point B. A crack started to appear on the windshield a few---ok, several months ago--and once again, I waited as long as I could to replace it. When I finally got around to calling the glass company, I was pleasantly suprised that they offered to come to my house to fix the glass. It was long overdue.

The technician showed up a few days ago, introduced himself with a smile and a warm handshake, and quickly began working. Thirty minutes into the project, I heard a knock at the door. I opened the door to see him standing there, smileless, and holding a copy of the initial agreement. "Is your car a '94 or '93?" he asked. I told him I thought it was a '94, and he quickly let me know I gave him the wrong information when we scheduled the appointment. He checked the VIN number to find out that the car was actually a '93. This minor blooper on my part meant he had the wrong windshield, and he was now going to have to drive all over town to find the correct one. Unfortunately, I just extended his workday by a few hours.

He was visibly frustrated, and I was embarassed. I knew I blew it. Typically, a particular windshield would fit consecutive years of vehicles, but in this instance, there happened to be a difference between the '93 and '94 windshields. We stood there staring at each other, in a bit of a showdown, and I found myself wrestling with whether or not I wanted to take responsibility. It's not hard to come up with excuses when you don't feel like apologizing. Did I really tell them the wrong year? Did they mess up by writing down the wrong year? No excuses. I messed up.

It was tough to look him in the eye and apologize for wasting so much of his time. It took some work, but I finally mustered the courage to take responsibility. The first part of the conversation was extremely awkward--until I apologized. As soon as he heard the words, "I'm sorry", his demeanor changed and it was as if I was talking to an entirely different person. He was very pleasant and gracious for the rest of the job--especially suprising considering that he was still working at 7pm (in the rain!) instead of being at home with his family.

"I'm sorry" is a powerful little phrase. Those two words have the capacity to pump life into a strained marriage, restore old friendships, and keep us in agreement with God. As a matter of fact, I can't think of a single negative result from saying "I'm sorry." Sure your pride takes a hit, but isn't that a good thing?

A cracked windshield usually starts with a simple chip. The more you ignore it, the more it grows and becomes increasingly visible. In my case, the chip turned into a major crack which spiderwebbed across the entire windshield leaving me little room to see. I put up with it for a long enough period of time that it eventually became the norm. Offence in relationships has a smiliar effect. Somebody will say something or do something that will serve as a "chip", and if it is not dealt with it will spread and eventually contaminate the entire relationship.

A few years ago, it became clear that God was asking me to make a phone call. I drug my feet and asked myself a few hundred times if it was really God. It was painfully obvious that God was in it, so I dialed the number. My heart was pounding as I waited for somebody to pick up on the other line. Just before I was about to bail and hang up, I heard a voice on the other end. Bummer. I was really going to have to go through with this after all. "Sorry, I have the wrong number" was not an option. I was calling to apologize for some hurtful things that I had written anonymously about another person from eight or nine years ago. God had not forgotten. He wanted me to make things right. I confessed to my wrong doing and apologized profusely. It was an incredibly healthy conversation where much grace was extended towards me. He even found time to encourage me in the midst of my apology.

I encourage you to take some time and reflect on your life and your relationships. Perhaps you've already been feeling uneasy as you've read this because you know what is coming! Is God asking you to apologize for anything? Is there something that you've done that God is wanting you to make right? Are there any friendships in your life that are currently strained? Have you been waiting for the other person to apologize? Are you caught in the cycle of replaying conversations over and over again in your mind? Have you allowed bitterness and unforgiveness to settle in your heart? I know the feeling; it's miserable.

There is a way out. There are greener pastures to enjoy. There is a better view. It starts with the courage and humility to speak a simple phrase from the heart. As you take this step, you'll see how God will meet you there. He'll help you. He'll be smiling the entire time. Your heart will breathe fresh life. The crack will disappear and you will be able to see clearly again.

I got in my car the following day, pulled away from the garage, and was suprised at how different the view was. I asked myself, "What took me so long to fix this?" I can actually see the road now.

Ashley Sandwich

I was surprised Ashley agreed to the proposition of going for a four wheeler ride last weekend. I was shocked when she agreed to allow Libby to come with us. It's not that my wife is afraid of four wheelers or dislikes dogs, but she is 8 months pregnant, and we were headed for an extremely bumpy country road.

My wife likes adventure--as long as she still feels pretty in the midst of it. I have learned that she has a subconscious scale that connects how much she enjoys a particular activity to how pretty she feels while participating. True story.

Don't get me wrong, Ashley is a tough gal. A few years ago, she finished the Las Vegas marathon while running on an injured hip. She left me in the dust last summer when we were riding the 62 mile Elephant Rock Bicycle Tour "together". A few months later, she completed the Copper Triangle--an 80 mile bike ride that covered three mountain passes deep in the Rocky Mountains. She's tough--and competitive--and lucky. She also happened to beat me in our last two games of put-put golf.

When Ashley saddled up on the four wheeler, sandwiched between a hairy dog and myself, I couldn't help but be incredibly attracted to her. I always think she's pretty, but the "hottness meter" peaks when she does something like this. These are usually the times when she feels the least attractive. In this case, I couldn't stop looking at her, and she barely let me take a picture because she FELT gross. This is a small example of how our feelings can be deceptive.

How often are we all deceived by our feelings? It may be something as simple as not feeling attractive, or it may be something as serious as not feeling worthy of a relationship with God. Many people don't feel forgiven; nor do they feel like forgiving others. It's easy to not feel like engaging your family in meaningful conversation. Perhaps you didn't feel like apologizing last time you really blew it. The sweat that turned to blood as it dripped down his face while he agonized in the garden shows us that Jesus didn't feel like going to the cross. Out of obedience, he submitted and carried on with the greatest rescue mission in the history of time.

Not only are feelings deceptive, but if we pay enough attention to them, they will eventually create a frustrating rut in our lives. Too often, we create behavior patterns that are centered around feelings instead of the unchanging truth of the Scriptures. If you are lacking love, joy, and peace, there is a good chance you may fall into this category.

Feelings come and go. Feelings change. The word of God is designed to be an anchor for our soul. The Scriptures don't contain suggestions; they are full of commands that should impact our daily decisions. The more we dive into His word, the more it will change our thinking. The more our thinking changes, the more our feelings will change. We have to start by believing what the Bible says and acting upon it whether we feel like it or not. This will stretch and grow us all. It's certainly not easy; but it is worth it. The more we do this, the more the frustrating rut will disappear and love, joy, and peace will appear. I think that's a trade worth making.