Gone Loco

"Be still and know that I am God." Psalm 46:10

Here's a quick challenge for you... Try and sit still without thinking about or doing anything for 60 seconds. Go.

The first time I attempted this, I think I made it 4.5 seconds before my mind began thinking about other things. I am now up to 9.5 seconds before I'm distracted. I am making serious progress, my friends.

This challenge is a result of an interesting question God recently asked me. I was pondering God's long term plans for my life when my thoughts were suddenly interrupted. The heavens didn't part, nor did I hear a booming voice from heaven, but the question was clear. He asked, "Gabe, have you noticed that most of your questions for me deal with 'doing'?"

That simple question had me thinking for days. As usual, he was right. Most of my interaction with God had been centered around the idea of doing work for him and asking about his future plans (work) for me. I am convinced that we should ask these questions often, but I am also confident that he wants more than just our actions and our work. He wants us to stop all the "doing" and "be".

In response to this revelation, I have started practicing a new habit. I sit before God with a clear heart and a clear mind and make myself available for him to speak. I don't think about anything. I don't do anything. I force myself to sit there and be fully present. Most men know how challenging this seemingly simple task is. It's almost as if we need a bull riding buzzer to beep after the 8 second mark to celebrate our accomplishment.

The voice of the Holy Spirit speaks in very personal ways, but he is always presenting truth. This is the identifier we should look for. Again, I've never heard anything audible. It's more of an impression on my heart, or a thought or train of thoughts that enter my mind. The common denominator is that I recognize it as being from God based on the undeniable amount of truth that the statement contains. How do I know it's truth? I recognize it from the Scriptures. I tell people that it's extremely important to spend plenty of time reading the Scriptures in order to easily recognize the voice of the Holy Spirit. Ultimately, they are revealing the exact same thing--truth.

I realize that by simply stating you can learn to hear God's voice, I have landed myself in the "crazy camp" to some. You see people all the time doing bizarre and harmful things because, in their words, "God told them to." I see how some people have arrived at their "any normal person doesn't believe God speaks" theory. But, do the actions of a few flaky or truly disturbed people really disqualify God from being a deeply personal God? Isn't this the same God who was nailed to a wooden cross and endured excruciating pain to demonstrate his desire for personal relationship? What is personal relationship without personal communication?

I am currently pursuing my master's degree in counseling at a local university, and part of the degree program is to study mental health disorders. During our last class, my professor stated that some perfectly sane Christians can be diagnosed with "schizophrenia" because they claim to hear the voice of God. Interesting.

I wonder what Adam and Eve would have been diagnosed with; they claimed they were tricked by a talking snake. Moses surely would have been diagnosed with some kind of disorder; he claimed God spoke to him from a burning bush. Noah may have been the person tagged with the most mental disorders as he built a large ark in the middle of the desert announcing that God was going to save the world through him. Oh, and don't forget about Mary. She claimed that she was pregnant--but that she was still a virgin. Huh?

Maybe learning to hear the whisper of the Holy Spirit isn't that strange after all. But, even if it is, it's quite alright. We "crazies" are in good company. I can picture the look on their faces as they mockingly asked, "Aren't you really Joseph's son? Crazy man."

60 seconds...Go.

Mysterious Journey, Mysterious Guide

I have been reflecting lately about how life is hardly a straight and clear path. The journey we all find ourselves on is unique to us, but it's similar in the aspect that it's relatively mysterious. I suppose that's because God has a mysterious side. Sure, God wants to be known. He invites us to discover who he is. His heartbeat is for us to experience his goodness and enjoy the blessing of relationship with him. One of the greatest invitations in the Bible is to, "Taste and see that the Lord is good." (Psalm 37:4) But, he's mysterious in the sense that we can't fully understand him or his ways. After all, "his ways are higher than our ways and his thoughts higher than our thoughts." (Isaiah 55).

I am trying to become more organized so I recently did something that I have never done before...I bought a planner. As I went to Wal Mart to survey their selection, I was surprised to find that every single planner was either pink or had bright colored flowers on the cover. I thought to myself, "Guys must not buy planners." I eventually found a "manly planner", and I've actually enjoyed the planning process.

Now I'm quick to put my future appointments and plans on paper, but do I really know what is "around the corner" in life? Do I really know what God has planned for the days ahead? I believe God is doing so much more on a daily basis than will ever show up on a calendar. He is secretly aligning things for my benefit, and for his.

As I look at my calendar, my days look pretty ordinary. It's easy for me to fall into the pattern of grouping days together and losing my sense of anticipation for God to do something unexpected. We must not forget that God is an extraordinary God, and he is often working behind the scenes. Similar to a submarine being repositioned below the surface of the waters, God is positioning himself for what he knows is coming--and he wants to show you what he's doing. I have been "leaning in" recently to find out what he is really up to on a daily basis, and now I'm hooked...And intrigued...And excited.

Psalm 127 states, "Unless the Lord builds the house, the builders labor in vain." My prayer lately has been, "God, what are you building today and how can I cooperate?" He loves to answer that simple prayer. He delights when we lift our eyes from the ordinary work before us and find out what he's up to. His passion is to be involved in the details of our lives. Seriously. Try and think of one detail in your life that God is not interested in. He cares about what you care about, and he wants you to care about what he cares about. Eventually, his desire is to merge the two so you share the same heartbeat. Isn't that a beautiful process?

This certainly doesn't happen overnight. It's a daily process of being "alert and aware" (1 Peter 5) of God. Fight the urge to look at today as just another ordinary day. Ask God to surprise you. Actively look for his fingerprints today. Ask him to open your eyes to truly see. Invite him to open your ears so you begin to hear beyond the rackety noise of this world. Trust me, it's good.

Days will continue to come and go. The sun will rise and the sun will set. The path that we all find ourselves on will continue to twist and turn and disappear around the corner. But, aren't you glad? Aren't you thankful that life is not a boring "stroll in the park"? If it were, who would need a guide? If we didn't need a guide we would miss out on our greatest purpose in life--knowing the guide.

"He (Jesus) calls his own sheep by name and leads them out. When he has brought out all his own, he goes on ahead of them, and his sheep follow him because they know his voice." John 10:3-4

Bad Idea?

I had a flashback to 1996 tonight. No, I wasn't listening to Vanilla Ice. I was actually on a walk with my wonderful family at a nearby park. It started out like hundreds of other walks we have enjoyed together. Avery was smiling from ear to ear as she ran and played. Ashley was looking as beautiful as ever as the setting sun danced across her face. Sophie was in milk "la-la land" as her two month-old mind tried to take everything in. It was a perfect start to our walk. I didn't think it could get any better...Then, I noticed a wooden structure strategically placed across the pond. Friends, you must understand. I am a man who is constantly outnumbered 3-1 in the female/male ratio at the Jenkins house. I don't even have the luxury of owning a male dog. I wake up to Barney and Dora followed by a play time session with princesses. My wife is literally watching The Notebook for the hundredth time as I type this. I wouldn't trade my life for anything, but perhaps that will help you understand why my man heart smiled at what happened next. We happened to catch it on video.





I couldn't help but to yell across the pond and applaud the "courage" of the kid who just reminded me of the hundreds of bad ideas I entertained when I was his age. I stood there on the bank of that pond and smiled as the memories came rushing back. My mind instantly rewinded to the day I built my own bike ramp and tried to ramp across a large mud pool that my friends helped me dig. It didn't end well.

I had other bad ideas that didn't hurt as bad--at least, not physically. Somehow the idea popped (and stuck) into my head that I would look cool in shorts, high ankle Doc Martin boots, and tall socks for one of my senior picture poses. Ashley still reminds me that my "bowl" hair cut from my senior year in high school was also a bad idea. Ouch.

I thank God for protecting me from many of those testosterone and adventure filled bad ideas. I look back and smile on most of them. I also thank God for protecting me from the bad ideas that carried much heavier consequences. In fact, it was many of those bad ideas that led me to my knees on a January night many years ago as I made a good decision for once, to turn whole-heartedly and follow Jesus Christ. I think it's safe to say that my life took a dramatic turn at that moment. Jesus has a way of doing that.

I have recently been thinking about how the apostle Paul's life took a drastic turn on that dusty road to Damascus nearly two thousand years ago. Up until that moment, Paul (Saul at the time) had been a well-known and well-respected religious leader. He was set up perfectly to live a good life--until Jesus interrupted his plans.

As he neared Damascus on his journey, suddenly a light from heaven flashed around him. He fell to the ground and heard a voice say to him, “Saul, Saul, why do you persecute me?”
“Who are you, Lord?” Saul asked.
“I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting,” he replied. “Now get up and go into the city, and you will be told what you must do.” Acts 9:3-6

At face value it would appear that Paul's life started moving in the wrong direction directly after that brief conversation. Not only was Paul now blind as he struggled back to his feet, but a few verses later Jesus announces, "I will show him (Paul) how much he must suffer for my name."

Wow. Who would want to sign up for that? Paul confirmed in 2 Corinthians 11 that Jesus wasn't lying about the whole suffering thing:

Five times I received from the Jews the forty lashes minus one. Three times I was beaten with rods, once I was pelted with stones, three times I was shipwrecked, I spent a night and a day in the open sea, I have been constantly on the move. I have been in danger from rivers, in danger from bandits, in danger from my fellow Jews, in danger from Gentiles; in danger in the city, in danger in the country, in danger at sea; and in danger from false believers. I have labored and toiled and have often gone without sleep; I have known hunger and thirst and have often gone without food; I have been cold and naked. 2 Corinthians 11:24-27

A person could easily look at Paul's life and come to the conclusion that it must have been a BAD IDEA for him to follow Jesus! Perhaps he should have returned to Jerusalem and lived the remainder of his life as a blind religious teacher. He would have skipped the lashing sessions. He could have been studying the Old Testament Scriptures instead of being pelted with rocks. He could have been safe and warm in a temple rather than lost at sea. But, he would have missed knowing Jesus. He would have completely missed the true purpose of his life. The greatest day of Paul's life was probably the day he met Jesus on that dirty old road.

But whatever was to my profit I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord...Philippians 3:7-8

The only thing that could have possibly kept Paul from becoming bitter and disillusioned in those dark and cold prison cells was a real relationship with a real Jesus. Paul knew he was in for a long ride, but all that mattered to him was completing the race that God had set out for him. If he hadn't discovered the real Jesus, he would have never ended well. The joy of Paul's relationship with Jesus drove away the fear of death, and compelled him to endure torture so that others could experience this same Jesus. Paul tasted the goodness of God through Jesus, and it consumed everything in his life. Jesus desires the same for you and for me. That's the good news of the Gospel. We get to participate in the plans of God and experience Him on a deeply personal basis.

Six years ago I left a broadcasting career to pursue a church internship. I remember people looking me in the eye and asking, "Are you sure this is a good idea?" They reminded me that I was leaving a full-time, respectable job for a part-time internship that I was going to have to pay thousands of dollars to participate in. I smiled and reassured them it was a good idea...A much better idea than trying to clear a 12 foot mud hole with the aid of only a two foot ramp. I guess I had been trained well to take risks.

I'm sure it won't be the last time Jesus will lead me into a situation that will cause people to question my logic. I probably won't get any better at convincing them it's a good idea either. All I know is that Jesus is far better than I ever imagined, and following him is better than anything else I've ever known.

What a great idea it was to say "yes" to him. This is actually an idea that will end well.

“No eye has seen, no ear has heard, and no mind has imagined what God has prepared for those who love him.” 1 Corinthians 2:9

Sing Hallelulah

Our second daughter, Sophie Elizabeth Jenkins, was born last Thursday afternoon. Words can't describe the joy I experienced the moment I first saw her. I may be biased, but she is so beautiful!

As I held my new daughter for the first time, and my eyes surveyed her newborn skin and dark hair, I began to think about God's wonderful plans for her. Sophie's life is a story that is just beginning. God is holding the pen, and I'm confident He will tell one grand story through her. That's one of my favorite aspects of God--He's an amazing author. He always has been and always will be.

My prayer for Sophie is that she'll be aware of the story that is unfolding around her on a daily basis. It truly is a love story--a passionate love story between the Creator of the Universe and this 6 lb 14 ounce beauty. How fun it will be to watch this play out. I think she's off to a good start...

Here's a video of Sophie's story so far.

Not As It Appears

I made a call this week to have the yard aerated. To be honest, I had no idea what benefit aerating the grass had, but I still made the call and wrote the check. I have since done some research and have learned that it's incredibly healthy for the soil. In a nutshell, it's the removal of soil plugs in order to increase the water, nutrient, and oxygen movement into the soil. Something had to be removed, so that something much needed could enter...More on that later.

A recently aerated lawn is an interesting sight. It looks like a person has neglected to clean up after their dog since the late 1990's. When I was a young boy, one of my weekly chores included going on "poop patrol."  I believe I became quite proficient at searching the yard--while watching my steps very closely--scooping, and disposing of the "treasure" in record time. I was good...Maybe that's why I never got fired from the job.

Very early on in my scooping career, I remember picking up a shovel and walking to the back yard only to see a sight that no eight year old pooper scooper wants to see. My parents had just had the lawn aerated, but to me it looked like every dog in a five mile radius had just left me a present. I stood there in disbelief. I glanced at the neighbor's yard to see if they were also the recipients of the dog party, but their yard was "poopless." How could this be? Was this some sort of bad joke? I was discouraged.

Now that I'm thirty, I look back and smile on that day. My lack of understanding of lawn aeration led me to believe that my eight year old life just got a lot worse. In reality, what I thought was a horrible sight was actually quite healthy for the yard--and good for me. I believe I dismissed myself of my duties that day claiming that I couldn't tell the difference between the dog's mess and the aeration. My initial reaction was clearly misguided.

That wasn't the last time my initial response to something has been off. I've noticed how easy it is to make an initial judgment on something thinking it's bad, and then placing the blame on God for causing it. When this happens it's just a matter of time before your heart grows hard towards the God who is crazy about you.

Several years ago, I had a relationship crumble around me. I was deeply invested into this relationship and thought it would most likely end in marriage. In the depths of my heart, I knew the relationship wasn't what God wanted, but I chose to ignore the truth and continue plowing forward. I'll never forget the pain in my heart as the two of us came to grips with the reality of breaking up for good. I was heartbroken. I was devastated. I literally took my phone and threw it across the room as I blamed God for breaking my heart. I lacked understanding. My initial response was way off, again. In this case, the relationship needed to be removed so that God could enter and have His way.

I took Avery on a daddy-daughter date a few weeks ago, and we enjoyed some seriously delicious meatball sandwiches (this time it was my pick!). I sat across the table from her and was taken aback by how her blue eyes were shining so brightly in the light. As we talked, laughed, and made a mess, I noticed a song that happened to be playing on the radio in the background. It was a song that reminded me of my former relationship. It was quite evident to me that the pain was long gone, and instead of anger at God, I couldn't stop praising Him. God knew what He was doing after all. All I had to do is look across the table and into the eyes of my daughter to be reminded of His faithfulness. I drove home and embraced my wife with a hug and kiss, and thanked God for being so patient with me.

Living with a hard heart is a miserable way to live life. It will rob you of experiencing the joy God created you to experience. Life can be rough. Life can seem wildly unfair. But I pray that you'll fight with every ounce of strength within you to maintain a soft heart. The Scriptures clearly state the importance of this in Proverbs 4:23: "Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it."

The next time you are tempted to blame God for causing something bad in your life, I encourage you to pause and ask Him to give you true understanding into the situation. Remind yourself of God's nature. He is the life giver, not the thief. Fight the urge to run from God, and cling to Him. You'll be in good hands.

Romans 8:28 "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."

Glorious and More Glorious

There are few dull moments when you are married to a woman who is 9 months pregnant. I've been on high alert for the past several days. Just last week I was sitting in my comfortable brown recliner when I heard moaning and groaning coming from upstairs. I jumped to my feet and ran over to the stairs--fully expecting to load Ashley up, and like a 10 year old sitting behind a steering wheel in an arcade, drive 80 mph weaving my way in and out of traffic on our way to the hospital (the man clearly gets the better deal in this whole process). I got to the stairs and with deep concern and anticipation in my voice asked her what was happening. Her response was, "Ooh nothing honey. I just feel so large!" False alarm. The racecar driving would have to wait for another day.

I was recently driving (the speed limit) down the interstate when my eyes drifted over to enjoy the majestic and beautiful Colorado Rockies. I have surveyed these same mountains thousands of times over the past six years, but this time was different. I was drawn to the extraordinary detail that God used as He shaped this particular mountain range. As my eyes shifted back and forth between the road and the mountains, I began thinking about how God had placed every tree just where He wanted it. He shaped every nook and cranny on every mountain. Even today, He orders the water where to run as the snow melt turns into summer streams. Praise filled my heart as I thought about the good work God accomplished in creating the Rocky Mountains.

He responded by speaking the following statement to my heart: "I put more work into creating you than I did that mountain range." My initial response was to think that I must have eaten a bad pizza for lunch and am now hearing things. Surely God didn't put more detail into creating me than this spectacular mountain range my eyes were beholding. I'm confident I heard Him right, but it took my heart a minute to digest the truth of that statement.

13 For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
15 My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place,
when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.
16 Your eyes saw my unformed body;
all the days ordained for me were written in your book
before one of them came to be. Psalm 139:13-16

The development process that occurs inside the womb is fascinating. It reveals just how detailed and mysterious God is. He created the earth and everything in it in seven days, and yet He chooses to take nine months to form a baby inside the womb! We really are His masterpiece (Ephesians 2:10).

Pikes Peak is a glorious mountain. It's never uttered a word, but it speaks continually of the presence and glory of the Creator. This glorious God has placed more glory upon you than on any mountain, canyon, ocean, sunset, or anything else your eyes will see. He has made you in His image. It's true that you bear His name and His image. Let that sink into your heart. You are His primary plan to reveal His glory to a dark world. When we grasp the truth of this, life goes from being mundane, boring and ordinary to extraordinary, supernatural and purposeful.

Our second daughter will arrive any day now. As excited as we are, we're also aware that she really doesn't belong to us but rather to God. He knew her before the creation of the world, and He has spent the past nine months meticulously forming her. May I be a good steward of something that is so precious to Him.

God help me.

Messy Fingers and Clean Pages

Avery and I recently embarked on another daddy-daughter date, and it was wonderful as usual. As we pulled into the parking lot at Chic-Fil-A, the smile on her face communicated that I had chosen correctly. She knew she was about to enjoy some quality chicken nuggets, play time on their slide, and some time with dad.

What she didn't realize was that there would be an added bonus to this particular date. As we sat there enjoying our meals and each other's company, I could tell Avery had spotted something interesting over my shoulder. In fact, her eyes about popped out of her head as soon as she saw "it". I turned to see what she was looking at, and sure enough, the Chic-Fil-A cow was officially in the building. She started bouncing in her seat and pointing at the large bovine. I was also happy to see the cow, even though I knew it would steal her attention for the rest of our meal. Stinking cow....

Avery spent the next several minutes waving at the cow from a distance, and making "moooo" noises. She laughed the whole time. I was still trying hopelessly to engage her in conversation, but it wasn't happening. I soon joined her in making "moooo" noises.

The cow slowly began to make its way in our direction, and I watched as Avery's look changed from fascination to uncertainty. The waving and "moooing" stopped, and it wasn't long before she was quite scared.




I stopped recording and quickly picked Avery up to comfort her (she gave me a big ketchup fingers hug--love it!), and I assured her that, "Daddy wouldn't let the cow hurt her." She eventually calmed down, and started waving at the cow again--from a safe distance.

The friendly Chic-Fil-A cow is quite harmless--especially when dad is present. I'm not going to let anything near Avery that will harm her. She is safe because she is with me. She is safe because of my great love for her. In the heat of the moment, she forgot that simple truth and allowed fear to grip her heart.

This happens to all of us from time to time. We forget who our Heavenly Father is, and we allow fear to grip our heart. The truth is that we have nothing to fear. You are safe because of the Father's great love for you. You are safe because of the Father's presence. You are safe because you are his son/daughter, and He has taken responsibility for your life.

14 For those who are led by the Spirit of God are the children of God. 15 The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship. And by him we cry, “Abba, Father.” 16 The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children. Romans 8:14-16.

The Scriptures reveal to us that as we grow in our understanding of "sonship", fear will lose its place in our hearts. When we understand the true nature of God as our Father, nothing can scare or shake us. If God is for us, who can be against us? When we misunderstand the true nature of God, we give fear a place to abide. Simply put, fear is a result of a misunderstanding of the Father's nature.

I recently noticed that I had been allowing a fear of rejection to linger in my heart. It had affected my behavior and resulted in timidity in certain areas of my life. Armed with the understanding that fear is a result of believing a lie, I went to God and asked him to reveal the lie that had made a subtle home in my heart.

God is faithful. Not only did He reveal the lie, but he also revealed the truth. I didn't have to twist his arm to show me the truth; He had been waiting patiently for me to ask. I renounced the lie, and took hold of the truth. Before long, I experienced the welcomed arrival of freedom (John 8:32).

God's answer to my question surprised me. He gently revealed that I didn't fully trust Him. When I asked how I develop a deeper trust, He replied, "Start with a clean page and find out who I truly am." That was a bit of a shock. I could have responded in a prideful way. After all, I've been walking with Christ for many years. I am a pastor, and my job is to represent God--surely I know Him. I'm glad I accepted His offer, because it's been amazing to watch him re-reveal Himself. In some cases he simply reminded me of things I had forgotten, and in other cases He revealed amazing new revelation of His heart. As I grew in my understanding of His perfect love, fear was cast out (1 John 4:18).

I believe God wants to spend some quality time with you. Get away with Him and ask if you've allowed fear to entangle itself within your heart. Maybe you already know the answer, and you can simply skip to the next question--what lie have I believed, and what is the truth? Stay with the question until you get an answer. It will surely come. Then, take hold of the truth and meditate upon it. Write it down and place it where you can see it daily. Allow it to take root in your heart. As a good steak marinates in special sauce, let your heart marinate in the truth. You will like the result.

Looking back, the fear that I allowed to affect my heart was just as silly as Avery's fear of the "high-fiving" cow. When we see truth clearly, all fear is exposed and put in its proper place. Remember, you are not slaves of fear, but you are a son and daughter of the Most High God. God is calling you to live a fear-free, abundant life. Take Him up on the offer.

Start with a clean page.